We’re Waiting, Werner

By Mark Harris


The Israelites are crossing the Red Sea with the entire Egyptian army hot on their heels. One Israelite with thick glasses (Werner) has fallen behind and now is searching for something on the ground. Moses has sent one of his bravest men back to see what the hold up is.




Both in modern dress; Werner is wearing horn rimmed glasses.


Sound Effects: We can hear a faint sound of men marching and pounding horses hooves that gradually gets louder during the drama.
(Joshua runs up to Werner who is on his hands and knees searching for something)
Joshua: What are you doing Werner? Moses sent me back to see what the hold up is.
Werner: Hi Joshua. Can you help me find my favorite Egyptian gold scarab? I can’t seem to find it in all these rocks and dust. How can it be so dusty? Just an hour ago it was raining cats and dogs.
Joshua: Didn't you see what happened?
Werner: No, you know I can’t see too good and besides, I was too busy counting all the gold pieces those nice Egyptians gave me when we left.
Joshua: Well, you are right in the middle of the greatest miracle I have ever seen.
Werner: You mean bigger than all those plagues God sent on those poor Egyptians?
Joshua: Yeah, much bigger!
Werner: Really? What did I miss?
Joshua: Look around, where do you think you are?
Werner: Oh com’on Joshua, we’re in the middle of nowhere in a dry,  rocky bottomed canyon.
Joshua: Canyon huh? Come over here and look closer.
Werner: (hands outstreched feeling up and down an invisibile wall) Whoa... This can’t be! It looks like a wall of water!
Joshua: That’s exactly what it is. We don’t have much time, we’ve got to go NOW!
(Werner walks to the left and Joshua walks off to the right. Joshua quickly notices and runs back after him.)
Joshua: Stop Werner! You’re going the wrong way!
Werner: I’m going back to Egypt. I made a killing back there. I sold tons of frog legs to all the Egyptian restaurants and then I sold the business to Abdul for a wagon load of cash right before the frog glut hit.
Joshua: Don’t you hear that?
Werner: Yeah, what is all that noise?
Joshua: That noise is your worst nightmare. The whole Egyptian army is coming and I don’t think they want to buy frog legs. Wouldn't you rather come with us to the promised land?
Werner: What was I thinking? Of course I want to go to the promised land. What are we waiting for, let’s go!
(Werner runs past Joshua and Joshua follows. Werner doesn't go far before he stops and starts picking up rocks and stuffing them in his pockets.)
Joshua: What in the name of Jehovah are you doing now?
Werner: Oh nothing. (keeps putting rocks in his pockets)
Joshua: Why are you stuffing rocks in your pockets?
Werner: Well, actually Joshua, you gave me a great idea! But don’t get any ideas, I’m not about to share my profits with you.
Joshua: I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Werner: You said this was the greatest miracle you ever saw!
Joshua: So?
Werner: Think about it. People will pay good money for a souvenir.
Joshua: Those rocks will make you a good anchor if you don’t hurry up!
Werner: OK, OK.... I’m coming.
(Both men run off stage as the sound of Egyptian army gets very loud then suddenly replaced by a loud sound of rushing water that gradually calms to silence.)
Copyright  2003 Mark Harris. All rights reserved. 
This script may not be altered without express written permission from the copyright holder. This script may be freely copied, distributed and performed provided it is done so in its entirety. This copyright information must be reproduced on all copies of the script. In return for free performance, the author would like to be told of any performance. He may be contacted at mharris@cnbtxk.com